Post by jasonresurrection on Aug 20, 2007 18:26:31 GMT -6
We fade in on a rather disturbing scene. It's The Zombie's Crypt, except we notice something is immediately wrong. All of the horde that usually faithfully follows Jason wherever he goes, are lying on the floor. They're also not moving, have gaping holes in their bodies, and are covered in blood. Sitting over in the corner is Jason, with blood all over his face, hands, shirt, and pretty much every other part of his body. We can piece two and two together, and figure out what happened here. Jason ate them. He stands up, and hobbles over to his bone-throne (which actually looks to be made out of real bones now, as opposed to what it formerly looked like.) He sits in it, and stares the camera down. He begins to talk slowly, and without any hint of his former enthusiasm.
Jason: "I lost. Again. I'm getting f**king sick of it all. Graves isn't the only one who's on a losing streak. I've yet to win a match since I got here. But some people like to tell me I atleast have the fan following. That people like the idea of a f**king dancing zombie. Well I don't give a f**k what they think. POW Authority thought it would be funny booking myself and Oni against Big Ci and Reck Maverick. People said I was goofy, being the dancing undead, but now I'm facing a stereotypical italian and a f**king power ranger. Oni, you made some rather deterring comments about me. I've changed from what I was. I was the dancing undead, and now I'm just undead. I'm with you all the way. My dancing days are done, and my poor attempt to favor fan attention is definitely over. I'm undead, you claim to be a demon. We can be an etheral alliance, Oni. You may prefer to work alone, and so do I. But think of all that could be. Think of what we could accomplish. Daye and Night...we could completely slaughter them, and then cannibalize their remains. We could be the most dominant force imaginable. Just think about it.
Jason stands up, and walks over to the corpses of the undead. He kicks them a bit, and then chuckles a bit as they don't move. He turns back to the camera, and a grim grin is seen upon his face. He cackles hideously, and then begins to speak again.
Jason: "And now, to my opponents. Big Ci and Reck Maverick. Tony Coprano and Tommy from Mighty Morphing Power Rangers. Seriously. People couldn't take me seriously, but yet everyone's supposed to take you two seriously. What's going to happen after Oni and I beat and eat you? Is the mob going to do a drive by of my cemetary and Oni's sacrifice pit? Is the green megazord Godzilla ripoff going to trample through Newark? Is Flap Flanagan going to have to stop wearing his helmet!? Only time will tell, and time is the master and keeper of everything. But, for now, no one knows. All that is for certain, is that you're going to get much more of a fight out of us than you ever expected. You expected just a pushover match. A little match to get a little win under your f**king cushy big fat paychecks, a little extra shine to your championship titles. Well pretty soon, you're going to have to explain to everyone why you lost to the freaks that everyone expected you to beat the shit out of. Why you got your asses handed to you by the so-called jokes of the promotion. You'd just better hope you're alive enough to answer them. Because this saturday, you're going to get eaten alive.
Jason walks past the camera, and out of view of the screen. One of the supposed corpses lifts his head, and lets out a slight moan. Jason walks back out onto the screen, and with one hefty stomp, smashes the head of it. He kneels down and starts chomping away at the mashed skull. We fade out on that grisly image, with sucking and crunching audible.
Jason: "I lost. Again. I'm getting f**king sick of it all. Graves isn't the only one who's on a losing streak. I've yet to win a match since I got here. But some people like to tell me I atleast have the fan following. That people like the idea of a f**king dancing zombie. Well I don't give a f**k what they think. POW Authority thought it would be funny booking myself and Oni against Big Ci and Reck Maverick. People said I was goofy, being the dancing undead, but now I'm facing a stereotypical italian and a f**king power ranger. Oni, you made some rather deterring comments about me. I've changed from what I was. I was the dancing undead, and now I'm just undead. I'm with you all the way. My dancing days are done, and my poor attempt to favor fan attention is definitely over. I'm undead, you claim to be a demon. We can be an etheral alliance, Oni. You may prefer to work alone, and so do I. But think of all that could be. Think of what we could accomplish. Daye and Night...we could completely slaughter them, and then cannibalize their remains. We could be the most dominant force imaginable. Just think about it.
Jason stands up, and walks over to the corpses of the undead. He kicks them a bit, and then chuckles a bit as they don't move. He turns back to the camera, and a grim grin is seen upon his face. He cackles hideously, and then begins to speak again.
Jason: "And now, to my opponents. Big Ci and Reck Maverick. Tony Coprano and Tommy from Mighty Morphing Power Rangers. Seriously. People couldn't take me seriously, but yet everyone's supposed to take you two seriously. What's going to happen after Oni and I beat and eat you? Is the mob going to do a drive by of my cemetary and Oni's sacrifice pit? Is the green megazord Godzilla ripoff going to trample through Newark? Is Flap Flanagan going to have to stop wearing his helmet!? Only time will tell, and time is the master and keeper of everything. But, for now, no one knows. All that is for certain, is that you're going to get much more of a fight out of us than you ever expected. You expected just a pushover match. A little match to get a little win under your f**king cushy big fat paychecks, a little extra shine to your championship titles. Well pretty soon, you're going to have to explain to everyone why you lost to the freaks that everyone expected you to beat the shit out of. Why you got your asses handed to you by the so-called jokes of the promotion. You'd just better hope you're alive enough to answer them. Because this saturday, you're going to get eaten alive.
Jason walks past the camera, and out of view of the screen. One of the supposed corpses lifts his head, and lets out a slight moan. Jason walks back out onto the screen, and with one hefty stomp, smashes the head of it. He kneels down and starts chomping away at the mashed skull. We fade out on that grisly image, with sucking and crunching audible.