Post by thewobert on May 25, 2007 1:38:41 GMT -6
The scene opens with in the hallway with the camera following Toro Verde. He passes random crew members before entering the men’s locker room. The locker room doors open up to an interesting scene. Toro Verde stands in the doorway, staring into the smoke filled room. Easy listening meditation music comes from an unknown source inside the room. Toro walks through the smoke and finds Buddy sitting cross-legged on the floor in the middle of the room. He sits with his eyes closed and his arms out at his sides in some meditation stance. Everything below his armpits is blocked by the smoke.
“Buddy? What are you doing?” Toro asks.
“I’m meditating dude.” Buddy replies.
“Meditating?” Toro questions.
“That’s right dude; meditating. I’m Buddhaing dude.” Buddy hums.
“Buddhaing? Is that even a word?”
“It is now dude.”
“Shouldn’t you be getting for our match with Cormac?”
“I am getting ready dude.”
“How is this getting ready? He sucker punched you! You should be getting ready to hit him back!”
“Sucker punch? Don’t you mean punched a sucker?”
“Buddy…”
“Me and Cormac go way back. We entered this business together back in the days of S.E.X.”
“What does that got to do with anything?”
“Everything dude. We were travel partners and even drinking buddies.”
“So you guys got drunk together, that don’t mean he has to hit you when you try to talk with him.”
“Its all about balance in The Force dude.”
“What are you talking about?”
“I’m talking about The Force dude. My friend Cormac has just been corrupted by the Dark Side.”
“Have you been watching Star Wars drunk again?”
“Fear is the path to the Dark Side. Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate, leads to suffering.”
“What are you talking about?”
““Remember, a Jedi’s strength flows from the Force. But beware. Anger, fear, aggression. The Dark Side are they. Once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny.”
“Dark Side?”
“That’s right dude.”
“Buddy, you’re making no sense.”
“Its perfect sense dude. Cormac fears he won’t be heavyweight champion. Fear leads to anger that he isn’t heavyweight champion. Anger leads to hate that he hates not being the heavyweight champion. Hate leads to suffering that he hits me.”
“He hit you because he is a drunken s.o.b.”
“The Dark Side has just clouded his mind. Uncloud his mind we will do.”
“Uncloud? That’s not a word either.”
“Use The Force we must. Jedi we must become.”
“Jedi?”
“That’s right dude. Defenders of peace we must be. The Light Side.”
“Buddy-”
“Go Jedi!” Buddy shouts as suddenly a green beam of light shots out from the smoke covering Buddy’s crotch.
“Buddy, what the hell is that?”
“It’s my lightsaber dude! I bought it on E-Bay last night. It’s a replica of Yoda’s!” Buddy swings it around and clears the smoke around him.
“Buddy?” Toro says as he stares down at Buddy and the twenty wine cooler bottles.
“Yeah dude?”
“Are you sitting there naked?”
“Hell yeah dude. This tile floor under my nude body is great for meditation.”
“God da-”
“Don’t say the lord’s name in vein dude.”
“Buddy! Get dressed and I’ll meet you in the ring!” Toro storms out.
“We shall do battle my friend Cormac, but there is still good in you. Search your feelings. May the force be with us both.”
“Buddy? What are you doing?” Toro asks.
“I’m meditating dude.” Buddy replies.
“Meditating?” Toro questions.
“That’s right dude; meditating. I’m Buddhaing dude.” Buddy hums.
“Buddhaing? Is that even a word?”
“It is now dude.”
“Shouldn’t you be getting for our match with Cormac?”
“I am getting ready dude.”
“How is this getting ready? He sucker punched you! You should be getting ready to hit him back!”
“Sucker punch? Don’t you mean punched a sucker?”
“Buddy…”
“Me and Cormac go way back. We entered this business together back in the days of S.E.X.”
“What does that got to do with anything?”
“Everything dude. We were travel partners and even drinking buddies.”
“So you guys got drunk together, that don’t mean he has to hit you when you try to talk with him.”
“Its all about balance in The Force dude.”
“What are you talking about?”
“I’m talking about The Force dude. My friend Cormac has just been corrupted by the Dark Side.”
“Have you been watching Star Wars drunk again?”
“Fear is the path to the Dark Side. Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate, leads to suffering.”
“What are you talking about?”
““Remember, a Jedi’s strength flows from the Force. But beware. Anger, fear, aggression. The Dark Side are they. Once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny.”
“Dark Side?”
“That’s right dude.”
“Buddy, you’re making no sense.”
“Its perfect sense dude. Cormac fears he won’t be heavyweight champion. Fear leads to anger that he isn’t heavyweight champion. Anger leads to hate that he hates not being the heavyweight champion. Hate leads to suffering that he hits me.”
“He hit you because he is a drunken s.o.b.”
“The Dark Side has just clouded his mind. Uncloud his mind we will do.”
“Uncloud? That’s not a word either.”
“Use The Force we must. Jedi we must become.”
“Jedi?”
“That’s right dude. Defenders of peace we must be. The Light Side.”
“Buddy-”
“Go Jedi!” Buddy shouts as suddenly a green beam of light shots out from the smoke covering Buddy’s crotch.
“Buddy, what the hell is that?”
“It’s my lightsaber dude! I bought it on E-Bay last night. It’s a replica of Yoda’s!” Buddy swings it around and clears the smoke around him.
“Buddy?” Toro says as he stares down at Buddy and the twenty wine cooler bottles.
“Yeah dude?”
“Are you sitting there naked?”
“Hell yeah dude. This tile floor under my nude body is great for meditation.”
“God da-”
“Don’t say the lord’s name in vein dude.”
“Buddy! Get dressed and I’ll meet you in the ring!” Toro storms out.
“We shall do battle my friend Cormac, but there is still good in you. Search your feelings. May the force be with us both.”